Category Archives: Humour

Melbourne is stage three lock down and someone at Garmin is having a very bad day…

Dear Rouleurs,

Of course it was too good to last. Back in May, Australia looked like it had dodged a COVID-19 bullet. Now that bloody virus gotten loose loose in Northern Melbourne and trigger this new stage 3, 6 week lockdown. Almost all the COVID-19 cases in Australian are in Victoria at present. About the only silver lining in this awful mess, is that road traffic around Melbourne has reduced significantly, which is great for cyclists. Who knows may be Melbournians will adopt the bike as their preferred mode of transport.


MMT took a snap shot of a great Mark Knight cartoon, that is in all honesty is bit rough on Victorian Preimer Dan Andrews. However it does capture the mood of frustration about how Victoria’s quaratine system was clearly being run by muppets. It appears that the Rydges on Swanston in Carlton and the Stamford Plaza in Melbourne’s city centre have been the epicentre for this new surge….WTF…. As the number of new cases keeps bounding along in the high 400’s, it will be interesting to see how the security company running fares in the recently announced inquiry.

Now speaking of stuff ups, something very odd is going on the Garmin Connect website. MMT has been trying to upload today’s ride around the Capital City trail when he encountered this error. Its been down for nearly 8 hours, which is seriously weird, given that its probably sitting on a Google or AWS cloud. MMT will be really f%#ked off if his 56 km ride disappears in into thin air. He finally navigated, clockwise the Capital City Trail, on the third attempt.

MMT checked a few social media groups and tried the website again tonight and its apparent something has gone wrong. Even an a UK newspaper, The Independant, has reported the outage. Someone at Garmin must be having a very bad day. In word…bugger..may be the website has caught COVID-19 or been done over by Chinese hackers…conspiracy theories run wild.

Until next time, ride safe and keep safe

Marv

Fiddling about with WordPress….and some cyclist humour

Dear Rouleurs,

This blog has another attempt at cycling humour, again care of FLAB ie Fat Lad At the Back. I feel a deep empathy for the kind soul that crafted this faux magazine cover. 🙂 Clearly, they are having a gentle dig at this etailer in the USA – Competitive Cyclist and at the hyper-competitive breed of cyclist that focuses on grams and kilojoules.

Fake new from a 'faux' magazine, the Non-competive Cyclist

The emphasis on cake, pork pies and putting the push back into push bikes, certainly gave MMT a bit of a chuckle. Its also a bit of test of the behind the scenes tinkering I’ve been doing with WordPress.

Let’s see if it worked…..Bugger, just checked – it didn’t – Boooooooo!!!

Until next time, stay safe, ride safe

MMT

Time for some cyclist humour about tan lines….

Dear Rouleurs,

MMT has been taking potshots at Millennials for a few years in this blog. After all it’s great sport to see generation ‘selfie’ suddenly realise the world, nay, universe doesn’t actually revolve around their sense of entitlement. MMT has particularly enjoyed poking fun Millennial’s preferred form of communication the infographic.  It’s a well take on the aphorism that a picture says a thousand words. 

Occasionally, MMT happens upon one that is genuinely amusing or informative.  Today’s infographic falls into the former category.  The visual is self-explanatory and here in Australia should have been accompanied by a ‘slip, slop, slap’ message of some kind.  There’s nothing funny about having serious skin cancer.

MMT reckons he saw this pop up in on the FLAB Facebook page. Although it looks like The Joy Divison liberated it first. The visual has stuck in MMT’s head, as his directeur sportiff, Mrs MMT, had commented how deeply tanned MTT’s legs were, hence the thoughtful and artistic addition to the graphic 😉 MMT is also big fan of zinc across the cheeks and nose. As Banksy once wrote “The bad artists imitiate, The great artists steal – Picasso Banksy Marv ;-)”

Until next time, stay safe, ride safe

Marv

One good turn, deserves another and a shameless plug

Dear Rouleurs,

MMT managed a 75km ride on a glorious winter morning. It was so good to be outside in the sun. Clearly, every cyclist in Melbourne thought the same thing, as there were literally thousands of cyclists of all shapes and sizes on Beach Road. The general mood at Tour de Cafe, Mordialloc, this morning was quite festive. MMT enjoyed a warm strong latte, while discretely ogling 2 Litespeed Ti framed bikes.

Opps! That was shamless plug no.1 and here’s a photo of that cafe 🙂 MMT doesn’t need to promote this cafe too much, its pretty much an institution in Melbourne’s eastern suburbs. Yesterday with 20+ cyclists standing around on sunny but cold morning, it was a small slice of heaven.

This is one of the few photos MMT has seen of this cafe without cyclists milling around outside waiting for coffee 😉

That brings MMT to shameless plug no.2 for Get to the Greek in Port Melbourne. MMT has been collecting pick-up lamb gryos and souvlaki as a Friday night treat for Team MMT. It is quite inexpensive and very tasty. There’s a decent picture of the place, acquired care of Google.

yep, another photo liberated from the WWW, without any credit given to the photographer…opps!! 🙂

Last Friday night, MMT rolled up to pay and collect, when the resturant manager offered MMT a free beer. Since the COVID-19 lockdown in Melbourne started, MMT couldn’t rememer the last time he had a beer. So it was gratefully accepted. The order arrived seconds later, and manager provided the free beer in a takeaway cup. How good was that??

Until next time, ride safe and stay safe

MMT