Monthly Archives: June 2017

Bollards to that…apologies to Attilla the Stockbroker

Dear Rouleurs,

I just had to post this one.  Post – that luntatic ice addict driving his car down Bourke St Mall and all the terrible, terrible acts of religious fanatics in London, Melbourne has received its own fleet of hideous concrete bollards.  They are scattered all over the CBD. Whilst these things seem to be unfortunately necessary, they are unspeakably ugly.  The picture below is sufficient proof of that.

A row of concrete eyesores near Fed Square.

So much to MMT’s surprise, an interesting article, documenting a wonderful public spirited response to these eyesores, appeared in the Age a few days ago.  I assume for reasons of cost cutting, after all its Fairfax print, the online version appeared only in the Sydney Morning Herald…WTF.

I’m surprised that anyone in the emerald city of Sydney would give 2 proverbial Shi#ts about these things in Melbourne???’

Another row of concrete eyesores near Southern Cross Station. One of them is just a little prettier, thanks to David Gray, the infamous Bollard Bandit.

Nevertheless, MMT feels compelled offer a polite and heartfelt ‘chapeau’ to Melbourne’s very own Bollard Bandit, David Gray for improving the city scape of Melbourne just a little bit.

Chapeau Monsieur Gray 🙂

Until next time, ride safe, avoiding bollards,

Marv

Marv’s May Bike Log

Dear Rouleurs,

May was an awesome month for cycling.  MMT broke his personal records for most kilometres in a week and in month.  The magical 800km barrier was broken and some of MMT’s RCC assisted Strava segment times were appearing in the top third for MMT’s age and weight.  It’s a great feeling to be healthy and on the move.

Exceeding the monthly target by 280km made up for an ordinary April.  Its also put MMT over 670km in front of his progressive annual target.  Unfortunately June hasn’t been anywhere as productive thus far.

So here’s my usual graphs.  As you can see It was a pretty even month for kilometres.  Thursday and Saturday are becoming the days were high numbers are consistently occurring.

Not surprisingly my suffer scores for May were stellar.  MMT had 5 suffer scores in excess of 70 and another 3 in excess of 55.

My ride log is found here.

Until next blog, ride safe.

Marv

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly of Melbourne’s urban cycling

Dear Rouleurs,

MMT has been making a significant effort to some blogging this week, in amongst some pretty busy times at work and at home.  Having a 1 year old daughter means both my wife’s and mine lives revolve around her moods and whims, whether we like it or not ;-).  Notwithstanding, MMT has been able to get out and about at lunch time.  Consequently, MMT’s eagle has noticed a few interesting sights around the CBD.  In MMT’s imitable and plagiaristic style, these have been labelled the GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY.

So the GOOD.  Much MMT’s amazement a new private bike hire scheme seems to have appeared out of nowhere on the streets of Melbourne CBD.  That illustrious paragon of journalism, The Age, seemed to have noticed it too -> When it comes to shared cycling, yellow is the new blue by Ebony Bowden.   OBike hail from Singapore and think they can give the Melbourne Bike Scheme a run for its money.  This photo was taken in Docklands and these bikes seemed be a bit lonely tucked away in a back lane.

Now to the BAD.  MMT has been trying out new barbers for his 15 minute 4 comb/2 comb clipper buzz cut.  MMT has gravitated to Kings Domain Barber in the Paris End of Collins St.  For some utterly inexplicable reason, MMT’s work place has blocked the barber shop’s web site, so you’ll have to look it up yourself.  In a nutshell, the barbers there are good, quick and cheap and more importantly don’t try and sell me product that my rapidly balding head doesn’t need.  MMT digresses.  Back to the topic, MMT leaves the barber shop and spies this courier bike chained to a post.  The owner came out later and looked like a total bad ass courier.  There’s one message that MMT strongly agreed with, after a near miss with an SUV in the back streets of Brighton earlier that morning.

Now the UGLY.  MMT was super impressed by the care taken by some civic minded individual who left these signs on the bike racks near ANZ Docklands.  May a terrible pox afflict the bike thieves that are responsible for this terrible larceny.

And that’s it the GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY of urban cycling in CBD Melbourne.

Until next time, ride safe.

 

Marv

 

What to do with all those old rubber inner tubes??

Dear Roulers,

Alas, I’ve been busy at work and sick…sigh…again, resulting in this blog being sadly neglected….Booooooo!!!!!!!!.  However its a quiet Friday afternoon and all my co-workers have nicked off early so I’m doing some blogging.  This blog is a bit of hack job/outright theft of an article I read in the May 2017 version of Bicycle Times.  Hopefully the publisher’s lawyers won’t be pursuing me for copyright/IP theft :-).

No matter, this article resonated with MMT as he was wondering what the hell to do with all the old and crappy inner tubes he has.  The question being, if a tube has been patched 3 or 4 times, isn’t it time to let it go?  In this age of recycling shouldn’t there be another use for these things.  Well this arch-plagiarist thinks so. So here’s five really cool uses of old inner tubes.

   
Tie Down Straps
Go to a camping store and find some 1 inch buckles.  A 28mm tube should thread through fairly easily.  They are perfect for strapping things down to a rack, securing items to your handle bars or pretty much anything you might use a bungee cord for.		  Loops
These can be used to hold new inner tubes, holding tools together so they don’t rattle or even holding a flashlight on the handle bars.  Mountain bike tubes seems to work best.
   
Pant Cuff
This one requires a bit more work.  Find some velcro, super glue and a length of rubber.  Figure out the right length for securing your pants/jeans.  Alternately, you could sow the velcro on instead.		 Protective Chain Cover
This is an awesome idea.  Thread your locking chain through the tube to stop it from scratching the bike frame or some other part.
 
Shoe Laces
This really surprised MMT.  Cut the length ways into strips of about 1 cm wide.  Follow the ribs of the tube so they are straight.  Cut them to length. Most laces are of the 55cm to 75cm variety.  Thread them through and tie them up.  You should be able to slip them on without untying them.

Now MMT did a smidge more research care of Google and found another set of interesting uses:

  • Fire starters: An inch-long bit wrapped around some kindling will start a fire, even in the rain.
  • Keep a bit of inner tube on your handlebars. Put it over the brake, locking your bike wheel, very useful when taking your bike on a train or bus.
  • Bits of inner tube make a great cushion between various attachments on your bike, much better than the insets that come with the items.
  • Wrap your D-Lock in inner tube to prevent damage to your bicycle’s paint.
  • Put inner tube on your rack. Your panniers will then fit perfectly and won’t rattle.
  • Inner tube make a great seal. It can be used to make lights waterproof.
  • Use as a seal round fuel or water bottles to stop them leaking

How about that for a list??

Until next time ride safe

Marv