Category Archives: Commuting

Ride a bike and save the planet. You can reduce your carbon footprint.

Peter Sagan vs Dog Walker or Why MMT needs to start commuting again

Dear Roulers,

Dear God where did the time go…………It is MMT’s third day back at work and he is wondering why, why, why did the summer go so quickly.  MMT has been humming Eddie Cochran’s Summertime Blues and generally feeling a bit lacklustre about the whole corporate warrior gig. Still, bills don’t pay themselves and paternity leave was wonderful while it lasted.

In the absence of a proper blog, MMT thought He would post this cycling infographic about the joys of commuting.  MMT is trying very, very hard to psych himself up to restart bicycle commuting again.  Unfortunately the midday summer rides have reduced MMT’s appetite for dodging abusive automobile operators and lunatic pedestrians with death wishes.

 

MMT get off your ass and commute.

Speaking of which I just had to steal…er…acquire this photo of Peter Sagan narrowly avoiding a dog and its wayward owner while competing in the individual time trial of 2017 Tirreno-Adriatico race.

Peter Sagan demonstrates a skillful swerve.

Sagan had to swerve abruptly onto the footpath to avoid a collision.  MMT recommends watching the youtube of this.  You can see Sagan pull up later and look around.  MMT guesses that the Czech equivalent of WTF was passing through his mind. Two observations: first the dog walker has correctly used a zebra crossing and second: where were the course marshals.  Given that its Italy, MMT is not sure what he is more amazed by.

MMT digresses.

Until next time, ride safe, particularly if there are thoughtless dog walkers about.

Marv

Off yer bike, Boris

Dear Rouleurs,

Team MMT has been having split brain conversations about that scion of UK Politics…Boris Johnson.  Whilst Boris has perfected the art of looking scruffy and speaking like someone who might be barking mad, he’s clearly not.  In his time as Lord Mayor of London Boris did big things for cyclists.  The “Boris” Hire Bike scheme and establishment dedicated bike lane ways has moved London from being one of the most dangerous places to ride a bike to one of the best. Chapeau Mr Johnson.  By the way, I think this dilemma about how to regard Boris is captured perfectly in this photo.

No... Boris Brexit is dumb idea.

No… Boris Brexit is dumb idea.

However, his entry into national politics has resulted many WTF moments, for example BREXIT. Educated Britons are wondering exactly how it was that Boris decided that siding with looney far right of Nigel Farrage’s UKIP was a good idea.  That coup etat resulted in both the Prime Minister David Cameron and some non-descript guy that was leading Labour, no longer leading their respective political parties.  Now Boris has the job of Foreign Secretary, presumably to salvage some kind of relationship with Europe and now has the added bonus of dealing with Trump foreign policy.  Also it seems that he’s now too important to be allowed to ride one of his own Boris bikes.

Today the Age syndicated an article called “Boris Johnson gives up his Boris Bike but London pedals on”,  where Boris bemoans the fact that he’s had to give up cycling –

“I used to cycle everywhere and I do miss it.” He said he had given up cycling more than 570 kilometres per year.  Mr Johnson said he had been banned from pedalling because “it involves a sort of convoy of police cyclists, plus cars, plus God knows what.”

Poor Boris, all those luxury armoured limousines, that must be really tough.  Oh and by the way, 570 km means he was doing about 12km a week.  MMT thinks this is pretty feeble effort anyway.

Dear God, who in their right mind would allow Boris to steer.

Dear God, who in their right mind would allow Boris to steer.

Do you really need your mother to dress you properly???

Do you really need your mother to dress you properly???

A simple post-Brexit message to Boris..perhaps.

A simple post-Brexit message to Boris..perhaps.

Opps...sorry about that send the complaint to my office. I'm sure that no one will look at it.

Opps…sorry about that. Send the complaint to my office. I’m sure that no one will look at it.

Any how to celebrate that MMT can ride his bike as much as he likes and Boris can’t, here’s a picture montage of Boris, cycling hero and dud politician on bike.  A sight that sadly we will no longer see, given its enormous entertainment value.

Until next blog, ride better than Boris

Marv

Name and shame part 2 – AJA 780

.

Dear Rouleurs,
Its been a few weeks since I’ve had a rant about dickhead ute drivers. May be I’ve been lucky. However, yesterday I had another close call with a dickhead ute driver. The driver of a black ute, Victorian registration AJA 780, was talking to his mate and looking at Port Melbourne Oval as he sped through the pedestrian crossing on Williamstown Road in Port Melbourne at 08:50am.  As always, the red star marks the spot.

Yes the driver of a white ute, registration OUF213 tried to kill me here today.

Yes, the driver of a white ute, registration OUF213 tried to kill me here today.

The vehicle was a black modern ute either Ford or Holden with mag rims and low profile tires and it looked a lot like this one.

20161014-blackute

The driver looked to be in his thirties, wore sunglasses and a baseball cap. If by some co-incidence, you come across this driver, feel free to punch him in the head and then direct him to this blog.

As Italians say ”Vaffanculo!!!’ with the appropriate hand gesture to you for some truly idiotic driving.  May be you sir are a future Darwin Award Winner.

Until next time, ride safe

Marv

OMG….its time to name and shame, the driver of OUF 213

.

Dear Rouleurs,

My morning commute to work traverses some very busy roads around Docklands, South Melbourne and Port Melbourne area.  I’m pretty damn careful.  However the one place that I’m utterly paranoid is the pedestrian crossing on Williamstown Road in Port Melbourne.  The red star marks the spot.

Yes the driver of a white ute, registration OUF213 tried to kill me here today.

Yes, the driver of a white ute, registration OUF213 tried to kill me here today.

Once again that paranoia acted as a survival instinct, as the driver of a white f#@king ute, Victorian registration, OUF 213, drove straight through the crossing, despite that the fact that the car travelling in the opposite direction had stopped. This flagrant breach of the law occurred at approximately 9.00 am.  The ute looked like a late model Ford and it’s load was tied down with a tarpaulin.  The driver looked to be in his fourties, wore glasses and had blonde hair.

If by some co-incidence, you come across this driver, feel free to punch him in the head and then direct him to this blog.  May be that will get his attention.  God knows being dressed in bright orange and seated on bike with no less than 4 bright flashing lights, didn’t.  Seriously, driver a pox on you and your house for some truly idiotic driving.

Until next time, ride safe

Marv